Aftermath

Halloween, Christmas, Easter Sunday
Don't fret here it comes another Monday
In the moment is strong and certainly not fleeting
strong and relentless soundless heart beating
My mind is flowin not even showin an ounce of compassion it just keeps going
That drug, that  rush that joke, that inability to feel my own throat
balling up my neck is so tight what the hell did I eat tonight
The list was long the list was dirty In a dark room feeling kinda surley
regretting and betting that tomorrow wont find me the drugs got a hold this shit has blinded me

How do I stand up and face tomorrow
sitting an wallowing in my own sorrow
basking in post addict climax never enough never not enough for this addict
My head it feels like in a vice
its just food I say it thrice
its not about food I say over again
get up tomorrow and love your own skin
This is the only way to deal with the affliction
for me when I deep, far down in my addiction.

Hugs & Shit

The Momma

"If I can be an example of getting sober, then I can be an example of starting over." - Macklemore

"I'm Spiter-mee-yan."

So Spiderman has been living at my house for the past 11 days. He is starting to smell. Every morning Thing 2 picks out his "outfit" to wear and everyday as soon as everything has been put on I hear out of his adorable little face, "I'm Spiter-mee-yan." and will repeat said sentence until I say, "What? Tell me one more time who you are?" To which he replies, "I'm Spiter-mee-yan." I have come to learn that Spiter-mee-yan is afraid of certain things such as; the garage door, rubber chickens from the dollar store, preschool, unwanted food items on his plate, the water tornado as the bathtub drains. But do you know who is not afraid of these things? That's right, Thing 2. He harbors this belief that once the Spiter-mee-yan costume is on he then becomes afraid of things; once it is off he is solid. The mind of a 3 and a half year old is a precious labyrinth of confusing thought patterns and full of confusion and delay.

Hugs & Shit

The Momma

Adventures with Boobs

The weirdest shit I have ever found in my bra or stuck to my boobs...

Googly eye - just one, I looked down in my sports bra and unnervingly it was staring right back up at me.

Toothpaste - Late night out, want to do a quick brush before bed, toothbrush was oddly flavorless, didn't care in my altered state of awareness, woke up with minty fresh boobs. Whatevs.

Peanut - We don't have peanuts in our house, Thing 2 is allergic, WTF. What did I do that day?

Pine Needles - I am the fucking master at erecting the Christmas tree. Nuff said.

Sock - Laundry day, in a rush, somehow my right boob evened out in size to my left. Shit I'm magic, nope just a sock.

Bacon Bits - Sometimes I get excited about a salad. Don't judge.

Lego - You think stepping on lego hurts. Having a piece of Lego stab your boob is like having a unicorn stab you in the chest. It is rare but it can happen.

Mango - Not as sexy as you'd might think.

Snowball - Not as funny as you'd might think.

Bird Shit - Cleavage at a packed Aquarium Show. I don't care what you say, that is fucking lucky!

Ketchup - It is a great way to alarm those around you.

Hugs & Shit...

Than Momma

                                     Throw Back Saturday - Poetry Edition

Lucy-fur, Thing 2, and Shifts

I am feeling the effects of serious blog neglect. Looking back at my last couple of blog entries I went from fit inspo momma to drunkey is 2.5 seconds. You can judge me because other people's opinions of me are none of my business; unless your name is Jesus or Brian. So where am I now?

Today I woke up at 5:00 AM to an obscenely obnoxious alarm that rattled my soul and willingness to face the day. I kicked my own butt out of bed and managed to kick the cat 12 times trying to make my way out of the house and go to the gym. I think my cat is trying to kill me. But what else is new. I think when I get up in her mind she is thinking, "Listen fucker today is you last day. Feed me and let me take a piss outside and when I'm good and done stand by the mother fucking door and wait for me to decided whether now is the right time to come inside or not. If you leave in that four legged gray beast of a metal wagon without my permission I will climb on top and I am roof surfing all the way to the gym with you to try and kill you there. If I missed my opportunity I will kill you when I get home at 7:35 AM." Lucy-fur thinks a lot, plots a lot, but so far I have foiled every evil plan for assassination. Kitty needs new game, I am smarter that the walking-down-stairs-cut-me-off-leg-weave.

I return from the gym proficiently sweaty when I am greeted by Thing 2. I ask Thing 2, "Did you have a poop?" To which he replies, "Hulk Smash!" as he annihilates this waffle with the over-sized hulk action fig. I look to the hubs and say, "1-2-3 NOT IT!" to which he harrumphs and changes Thing 2's diaper.  Best part is he did it in his nicely pressed pants, shirt and tie. I feel a little bit evil but I'm ok with that.

I stand by what I did.
I own it.

Thing 2 bail count 4
Destroyed waffles 3
A shift in the diaper which I did not have to deal with 1
Self-amused momma 1

Hugs & Shit

The Momma

Drunknblog 4.0

Ok drunkney back. You know what I love all female parties, there are so many Pinterest win foods it makes me want to have a cigarette after consuming the consumables.

Rum and coke is nice to my brain. My favorite rum is screech from Newfoundland not Newfoundland but really Jamaica.

You know what. You know when your crazy is when your cheese slips off the cracker.

Tangents I visited my first hunter bathroom.. It was unervibg to pee amongst the animals. They were judging me.

Megan just said don't say that or your dead to me followed with a csckle laugh.

I love you and your 70 dogs.

The momma