Lucy-fur, Thing 2, and Shifts

I am feeling the effects of serious blog neglect. Looking back at my last couple of blog entries I went from fit inspo momma to drunkey is 2.5 seconds. You can judge me because other people's opinions of me are none of my business; unless your name is Jesus or Brian. So where am I now?

Today I woke up at 5:00 AM to an obscenely obnoxious alarm that rattled my soul and willingness to face the day. I kicked my own butt out of bed and managed to kick the cat 12 times trying to make my way out of the house and go to the gym. I think my cat is trying to kill me. But what else is new. I think when I get up in her mind she is thinking, "Listen fucker today is you last day. Feed me and let me take a piss outside and when I'm good and done stand by the mother fucking door and wait for me to decided whether now is the right time to come inside or not. If you leave in that four legged gray beast of a metal wagon without my permission I will climb on top and I am roof surfing all the way to the gym with you to try and kill you there. If I missed my opportunity I will kill you when I get home at 7:35 AM." Lucy-fur thinks a lot, plots a lot, but so far I have foiled every evil plan for assassination. Kitty needs new game, I am smarter that the walking-down-stairs-cut-me-off-leg-weave.

I return from the gym proficiently sweaty when I am greeted by Thing 2. I ask Thing 2, "Did you have a poop?" To which he replies, "Hulk Smash!" as he annihilates this waffle with the over-sized hulk action fig. I look to the hubs and say, "1-2-3 NOT IT!" to which he harrumphs and changes Thing 2's diaper.  Best part is he did it in his nicely pressed pants, shirt and tie. I feel a little bit evil but I'm ok with that.

I stand by what I did.
I own it.

Thing 2 bail count 4
Destroyed waffles 3
A shift in the diaper which I did not have to deal with 1
Self-amused momma 1

Hugs & Shit

The Momma