Thrift Shoppin' - Aquired Nothing but Haunted Memories

My pal Blennifer and I went to the local thrift shop last week and found amazing things that survived a satanic cult fire many moons ago. We thought we would share a few magical yet scary moments with you.

Thing 2 was not having any of it.

It all started when Blennifer belted out, "Hey look it is Anita Bryant!" I responded with a tentative "oh yeah?" Thinking should I know this singer? Will I sound stupid on my pop culture know-how if I do not know this person? It turns out Blennifer doesn't know Anita Bryant, she was just having a laugh. My question is; Who is this Anita Bryant lady? We came to the conclusion that she's a nice lady.

Then Harry Secombe came along with his mutton chops and smug look knowing in his mind that he did in fact rule the world.

Then I found this gem and thought to myself who were those lucky bastards to lead pop culture into the wonderful, wild, wacky, world of jazzercisin'?

Flipped the cover...Look no more.

Then I spotted this dingus and wondered who are Kenneth McKellar's People? And why did they do it?

Then I saw this in loud red size 72 font: "Still More!" and I thought you know Mitch there is always another record album to be had.

And here it was. I can face tomorrow is always a nice inspirational thing to say especially if you predict tomorrow will be particularly difficult.

Then this scared the shit out of me. Ever since the 80s masked dolls and masquerade shit has always haunted me in my dreams.

Along with evil polar bears ...

and 20 year old headless roosters of botulism-vegetable-marination

Then there was Brian the 30 foot tall brother of Jesus. (to scale)

10,000 Creepy Clowns 

Charlie Tait and his $3.99 trophy

This $6.99 nautical knick-knack

This $1.99 girl guide craft that guided us on our shopping horrors

 Which lead us to this...

Lastly, the beautiful hand-crafted lady for $19.99. I thought shit this must be a Royal Daulton or something for that price. I flipped it over to find carved in the  bottom, "Made by Susan" Susan must be a special lady.

Hugs & Shit

The Momma & Blennifer

AHHHHHHHH!

 

Breaking up is Hard to Do

The day I broke up with my scale...

I moved in with my then boyfriend, now husband and along with me came Mr. Rusty Trusty Scale. This scale had more power than anyone should give an inanimate object. It was like my disciplinarian, my godfather;
my shitty friend that only spoke truths and gave crappy advice. It told me when I was bad and good. It could lift me up one moment and crash me down a couple of hours later. It was a true love hate relationship. I could not live with it. I could not live without it. It was an albatross. I would step on the scale many times in one day. I gave it all the power to determine my worth. It was a sociopath. I grew accustomed to its daily abuse. Like any abusive relationship I could not imagine my life without it.

Until one day...

My Hubs sat me down with a tool box and demanded I take it apart. He said scales do not belong in this house. I sat for a long while wondering how I would ever determine my own worth? What would life be like if I didn't know the number? How will I continue to "inspire" myself to lose weight or track where I was at? I took off the top cover. Inside was a myriad of springs, cogs and wheels. Slowly but surely I picked apart the metal parts sobbing as if I were a lost child in the mall. I cried until my head ached and my face hurt. After a while, I looked around and I was surrounded by hundreds of little metal and plastic whirligigs. Now the scale exposed, it was nothing more that a hunk of scrap.

The Hubs came wandering over and took the top and bottom parts of the scale and put a little piece of paper inside. He stood me up and told me to stand on the scale. I was confused and feeling overwhelmed by his actions. He told me to look down. When I did I saw a little yellow piece of paper from underneath the glass where the numbers used to haunt me but now it was filled with the words, "You're Beautiful." That was 11 years ago and I have not stepped on a scale since and I do not miss it, not one bit.

Hugs & Shit

The Momma

20 Spiritual Questions with Kim Downey

Hello Blogger Readers!

A short while ago I sent out my responses to the following thought-provoking questions. (see below) 

I then put it out to you all and asked if you wanted to answer the questions and have it featured in my blog... Well here is the first set of answers I received... Here are Kim Downey's insightful responses: 

Why is there poverty and suffering in the world?
Government corruption, uneven distribution of resources, misplaced values, a perception of shortage that leads to a refusal to share.

What is the relationship between science and religion?
I am not religious and even less scientific. This hazy understanding of both fields has me believing that they do not have to be mutually exclusive. Science could one day prove the existence of a higher power. However, the existence of a higher power is a really just a small part of religion as a societal construct. So... define religion?

Why are so many people depressed?
Well, chemical imbalance for one. Beyond that, lack of fulfillment.

What are we all so afraid of?
Shortage, danger, isolation, death.

When is war justifiable?
I don't know, but I think there are times when it is. I am grateful to live in a country with abundant resources, protection of human rights, and a general sense of safety. If any of these things were threatened -- I don't know. I have visited countries whose citizens have felt that the wars taking place around them were necessary, such was the strength of their convictions when what they loved came under attack. I don't know.

How would a higher power want us to respond to aggression and terrorism?
I would think with love and understanding. Kumbayah. xo

How does one obtain true peace?
By fulfilling one's purpose. How does one identify one's purpose? Believe me, if I knew, I'd tell you.

What does it mean to live in the present moment?
To take a sledgehammer to all Apple products (see below). Seriously, I think it is keeping the senses open and doing your best at the work that is put in front of you, whether that is fetching your kid a cup of milk or splitting the atom.

What is our greatest distraction?
Apple products.

Is current religion serving its purpose?
In some cases, certainly. I know individuals and communities for whom religion is serving its purpose. And many for whom it is not. Globally, I think there's a long way to go on this.

What happens to you after you die?
The older I get, the less I believe in an afterlife. And I am surprisingly okay with that.

Describe Heaven and how to get there.
See above. I don't think I believe in Heaven. I believe that individuals can achieve peace here on earth, through much searching and work.

What is the meaning of life?
Today, I will say that the meaning of life is to serve. Serve others - first your family and friends, then your community, then, if you figure out how, the world. And throw a little love your own way too. Tomorrow, my answer may be different.

Describe Higher Power.
Higher power is a sense of purpose, hopefully in the service of another person, a principle, or a cause.

What is the greatest quality humans possess?
Imagination.

What is it that prevents people from living to their full potential?
Fear and seriously out of whack priorities.

Non-verbally, by motion or gesture only, act out what you believe to be the current condition of the world. 
I am shrugging my shoulders.


What is your one wish for the world?
For me, this is the hardest question. I will speak only about the world around me, the culture I live in. I wish we would acknowledge the power of art (visual art, music, literature, great film and TV) to change the way we think and behave, and as a byproduct of this, place more value on it and less on celebrity, professional sports, and business.


What is wisdom, and how do we gain it?
Wisdom is accepting that so much is beyond our control. We gain it through experience.

Are we all One?
No. I don't think it is possible to be, at least not as we currently are, with our limited ability to truly understand each other. Perhaps, though, the ultimate purpose of the human race is to achieve oneness, if we survive that long.

20 Spiritual Questions with Jennifer Cook!

A short while ago I sent out my responses to the following thought-provoking questions. (see below) 

I then put it out to you all and asked if you wanted to answer the questions and have it featured in my blog... Well here is the first set of answers I received... Here are Jennifer Cook's insightful responses: 

Why is there poverty and suffering in the world?
1. Because of greed. Because of a sense of entitlement. The ego. When we want, we suffer. When we don't get what we want we suffer. Desire and the inability to reach what we desire leads to suffering.

 
What is the relationship between science and religion?
2. Science is knowledge. Religion is belief. 

 
Why are so many people depressed?
3. Because we are so out of touch with ourselves and each other. Because we live in a capitalist society that dooms us to fail by telling us we are not enough, that we need more. An endless cycle of greed & suffering.

 
What are we all so afraid of? 

4. That we are unloved or unlovable.


When is war justifiable?
5. Absolutely never. There is never ever a reason to take another human life.

 
How would a higher power want us to respond to aggression and terrorism?
6. With love.

 
How does one obtain true peace?
7. Through love, compassion, kindness & generosity to the self and others.

 
What does it mean to live in the present moment?
What is our greatest distraction?
8. Be. Here. Now.
Our own minds.

 
Is current religion serving its purpose?
9. If it is not taken out of context or harming others, yes.

 
What happens to you after you die?
10. Not sure, I've never died( that I know of). I'm not sure it even matters. All that matters is this moment.

 
Describe Heaven and how to get there.
11. Heaven is now. Being fully awake, breathing the air, smelling the flowers, having the sun or a warm embrace touch you. You get there by embracing & meeting each moment with awareness.

 
What is the meaning of life? 

12. The meaning of life is to love and be loved.


Describe Higher Power.
13. Higher power is any force that you feel deeply connected to. Could be nature, a deity, God, the universe.

 
What is the greatest quality humans possess?
14. Our greatest quality is compassion. To feel another person's pain and help them through their struggle.

 
What is it that prevents people from living to their full potential?
15. Fear.

 
Non-verbally, by motion or gesture only, act out what you believe to be the current condition of the world. 
16. ...

What is your one wish for the world?
17. That we get out of our own heads. Look around, pay attention and end greed, desire, and suffering

What is wisdom, and how do we gain it?
18. Wisdom is being alive, existing with other humans. Learning to be in harmony with nature and each other. Also to love, the self and others is true wisdom.

 
Are we all One?

 19. We are all one. Just in different forms. We are all connected. When we harm another, we are also harming ourselves. The same as when we love another, we are also loving ourselves.

Thank you Jennifer for your beautiful words!

Don't be Fooled by all of This Fat Magic!

To look at me you would probably never have guessed that...

**Warning! I am tooting my own horn here in the hopes of making a big fucking point**

I played field hockey from the age 13 up until one year ago. I played a shut out game as goalie in an international tournament against the Netherlands and USA. I won MVP in grade 12 on my high school team. My Jr. High team won the Fraser Valley Championships 3 years in a row.

I played badminton in grade 10. I won all my matches in the year, I was undefeated. I went to the provincials and got 8th place in ladies doubles and mixed doubles.

I played softball up until one year ago. I started when I was 8. I once got a triple play when I played short stop on a co-ed team. I played provincially as a pitcher for fastpitch and nationally on a co-ed slo-pitch team. I have won many MVP awards. I once threw 10 pitches and struck out 3 girls in a row. I once had a batting average of 700. My record for striking out batters in one game is 11. In one slo-pitch game I batted 2 home runs and a triple. I hit a grand-slam homerun in front of Brendan Morrison (Ex-Vancouver Canuck).

I used to compete in triathlons as a teenager.
I was a part of the weight lifting club in jr. high.
I used to throw discus, javelin, and shot put and do quite well at meets.
I used to wrestle in jr. high.
My record long shot in golf is 210 yards.
I went to the Fraser Valley Championships for Tennis.
I played water polo.
I was a lifeguard and competed at lifeguarding events.
I played rugby and played in several 7s tournaments.
I was banned from playing dodge ball in my all female PE class. I beaned too many girls in the head.

Now: I go to the gym three times a week. I do 30 minutes of cardio, 45 minutes of weights and 20 minutes of circuit. BAM! Still fat and it is ok. I am ok. I have let go of any results. I have no fucking clue how much I weigh, which is so freeing. There are so many misconceptions out there about fat people like me. I am fit and fat, yes that does exist! In a nutshell... I love sports, I love to sweat and feel the burn. You would not know to look at me. Everyone has a story, listen and they may tell you.

HUGS & FIT

The Momma

Hydration is fun. 

                                                                Amazing...

                                                          

Compilation of some old writing...

I am an addict.
How does one explain the rate in which my brain decides to perpetuate the thoughts of my addiction?
How true does it have to be so you can understand the insanity of the nightly rituals surrounding the innocence of a cookie? The best part is you don’t need to understand. I don’t need to explain. You have to trust. Trust that when I say my mind is on autopilot. I can’t shut it off or make it go silent. My body needs a fix but wouldn’t it be dandy to just put it down, on the ground where my soul is left to fester. With out the sugar coursing through my veins I am left to face the world again. It’s too shocking, I’m blocking I can’t stand all the talking. I numb out. The cookie has taken disguise as a sweet little morsel but within it is lurking a shark with a dorsal fin. It’s chasing me, calling me, making a scene and my mind just balling me out. I am aching, shaking wishing I was baking but I know I need to figure out what it’s all about. Feelings come and go, I know, I’m not slow just to let you know it is not about food. Trust me it is more than you know.
Peace

I need three days give me the time to come off the sugar to help clear my mind.
Time is a gift don’t waste it they say I just need another day, an hour, to gather the power that is with in me to fight. Lip service you say, I cannot guarantee, the promise itself of serenity. How can I promise something that I cannot control, I am powerless you know. I have asked for help but they told me I was not sick, not sick enough as I am not in a ditch. But the ditch in my brain is deeper than any other. Any other person who suffers from this mother fucking mother. so would you please open your ears and your heart to what I am saying… Eating like I DO I AM slowly dying and decaying. Diabetes, stomach cancer, blindness and pain. Never mind the insanity that lives in my brain. So what does one do in a state such as this, let it go hand it over and give in to bliss. Easier said than done I just need three days to overcome the sugar leaving my body.

Without sugar I feel raw, raw like a hand being scraped across cement. My truth has been torn wide open, I am fucking exposed. I cannot hide. My chins feel weighted my cheeks are puffy from crying. I am coming down off the sugar. Like a heroine addict my body is grasping at anything a reason, an excuse anything to grasp on to the sugar I love and hate so dearly. I have detoxed before, I am in for a wild ride.

I have pointed out the elephant in the room. All truths came out. It hurt but it was good. What will be my final motivation? A slow death? Kids with the same affliction as me?  That is what is at stake. My life now as I know it. Gone. Sobering isn’t it. Huh… so that is what that statement really means.  Fuck. 

Oh, so you know my story, awesome. Maybe you should teach me a thing or two? Sorry. I don't have time for your tips and dogma. Instead of "shoulding" on someone you should sit down and listen. Listen to every last word I have to say. I think you can learn a few things from me. Once all is said, I will listen, but you cannot expect me to act. Diets, programs, pills, Lifestyle change, Canada Food Guide, Weight Watchers, Richard Simmons, Cathy Graham's fresh start, Grapefruits, cleanses, Soups, all the diet hype words. I have heard and done it all. Am I lazy? Hell no. Do I have no will power? Hell no. This is an addiction and until you can understand that go away, I don't want to hear, just put down the cookie, right?

The One Q & A - Thought-provoking Questions

About 8 years ago I watched an amazing thought-provoking movie called, "The One". On this show the following 20 questions were asked to some very influential scholars, artists, spiritual leaders and teachers. Below I have answered the 20 questions to the best of my ability. I don't claim to know anything about anything these are just my thoughts.

***If you are interested in being interviewed with these 20 questions let me know and you will be featured on the Momma Show! I would love to hear your answers to these questions and I promise you will be met with no judgement and kindness! I am truly fascinated in what you have to say!***

Why is there poverty and suffering in the world?
Money. Money creates and destroys as fast as it is produced.

What is the relationship between science and religion?
The relationship for science and religion starts at a quantum level. I believe to understand quantum you must be a bit of a spiritualist as quarks pop in and out of existence and only with the observer's attention does matter behave itself. You gotta have some faith around that. 

Why are so many people depressed?
Money. Desires people feel like have not been fulfilled. Hormonal imbalance dues to environmental changes. 

What are we all so afraid of?
Being alone, feeling unloved, and not knowing.

When is war justifiable?
Never ever ever never

How would a higher power want us to respond to aggression and terrorism?
With a creative solution that does not kick off more aggression. Forms of creative responses to aggression have already happened. Gandhi for instance. I am not saying passive resistance is the answer to all but there has to be many peaceful strategical ploys to try in different aggressive situations. Is there a position at the UN for that? If not, there should be.

How does one obtain true peace?
Loving oneself, to be at service to others with compassion and with unconditional love. 

What does it mean to live in the present moment?
Quieting the mind, to feel your own physical body, and to experience a moment free of attachment. 

What is our greatest distraction?
Money, celebrity, the false dreams, twerking, Cable TV, adverts etc...

Is current religion serving its purpose?
It is when the religion preaches unconditional love and to be at service to others with no judgement.

What happens to you after you die?
I believe you are met on the other side by deceased loved ones from current to past lives. You are shown your life and go through an inventory of life lessons. You look in on your loved ones who are currently living. You get to check out all the neat mysteries that have never been solved or have been hidden from public view. I always imagined that I get to really find out who shot JFK from the grassy knoll, what really happens in area 51, and where the treasure is buried on Oak Island in Nova Scotia. etc... I also cannot wait for helping my loved ones in the living world and to see how the world turns out.


Describe Heaven and how to get there.
Heaven is everywhere including in other solar systems and galaxies. Size is relative. I can't wait to see that we are in a forgotten science experiment in a glass mason jar on someone's shelf left in the garage.

What is the meaning of life?
To love and to be loved.

Describe Higher Power.Faith and Quantum physics. To me higher power is nothing more that the act of faith. I have faith tomorrow is coming. I have faith that the universe has got my back. I have faith that matter assembles it self to me every morning when I open my eyes to experience the day. I have faith that whatever is doled out to me in this lifetime I can handle and if I can't I have friends and family to help. Faith is everywhere, you don't have to go looking for it.


What is the greatest quality humans possess?
Compassion

What is it that prevents people from living to their full potential?
Fear and abuse

Non-verbally, by motion or gesture only, act out what you believe to be the current condition of the world. 
You had to be here.


What is your one wish for the world?
Spiritual evolution. I am hoping for a massive spiritual paradigm shift!


What is wisdom, and how do we gain it?
Experiencing life and all its ups and downs and a big dollop of listening.

Are we all One?
Absolutely, without a question.  Our quantum fields are not solitary. If you have a soul and observe the world you have an effect on absolutely everything.

***If you are interested in being interviewed with these 20 questions let me know and you will be featured on the Momma Show! I would love to hear your answers to these questions and I promise you will be met with no judgement and kindness! I am truly fascinated in what you have to say!***

Hugs & Shit

The Momma

                                             The Beautiful Quantum Field

The Dad-Bod

So here is some hot news-not news...

The dad-bod is in! You know what else is fucking in? Mom-bods. Just sayin'. Right here you heard it: mom-bods, big-bods, dad-bods, short-bods, skinny-bods, disabled-bods, freckled-bods, pale-bods, tanned-bods, pear-shaped-bods, apple-shaped-bods, hourglass-bods, flabby-bods, stretch-mark-bods, birth-mark-bods, colourful-bods, muscle-bods, tattoo-bods, small-bods, pierced-bods, scarred-bods,  tall-bods, gay-bods, bi-bods, pan-bods, trans-bods, allshadesofskin-bods, all-bods are fucking "in".

Men get this standard: No matter your size, you are hot and "in".

Women's current standards:

The New Standard for everyone: All bods are "in".


Just my beefy beef for today.

Hugs & Shit

The Momma