Love Thy Neighbour

A Mini Blog within a Blog, Blog Part I

 

Being a fat-advocate can be compared to the likes of feminism. If you do not know what feminism is the assumptions are made that you are an angry, man-hating woman when it couldn’t be further from the truth. As a fat-advocate I support all bodies’ shapes, weights, and sizes.  I do not shame skinny, fat, or fit people nor put them on a pedestal. All bodies need to be loved and supported equally. A fatvocate like me calls out cowards when they make unhelpful comments or give unsolicited advice. A fatvocate only wants body acceptance and self-love for everyone. A fatvocate is not out to make you fat and nor to make you feel bad about yourself. A fatvocate breaks down the notion that a size 14 and under equals good where size 14 and up equals bad. A fatvocate endorses nothing but love for other human beings. A fatvocate supports whatever healing journey you have with your body without judgement. Sounds awesome right?

A Mini Blog within a Blog, Blog  Part II

 

Since the advent of fitness, health, obesity, food articles and opinion pieces have been posted on the internet the well-intentioned and trolls come out. Everyone starts spouting off their two cents about why they think obesity is on the rise and how it is a financial drain on the economy. Hold up. Wait a minute. Let’s put this in to perspective people. These are classic distraction tactics that you have bought into, hard. The “War on Terror” is a drain on the economy, white collar crime is a drain on the economy, corporate excess, and human-driven environmental disasters are drains on the economy. This fat distraction is nothing more than that, a distraction. Yes obesity is on the rise, so are a lot of things. These articles are platforms for ignorant people to take out their frustrations and to help perpetuate the indoctrination of the beauty myth. You’ve been had. The truth is there is so much more happening in this world and propaganda has us so focused on the inane details of other people’s lives; hence, our obsession with reality TV and the Kardashians. What I desire are articles that have not been sponsored or driven by “hits” and “likes”. I want critical thinking. I want articles that have compassion and real information that are not influenced by corporate ties. Everyone has become an expert and a drone at the same time and this is very dangerous yet conducive to sheep-like mob-mentality behavior that subdues the masses so we become apathetic and more accepting of simple thoughts that require little to no thinking. It is easier to point the finger than to find out why. 

A Mini Blog within a Blog, Blog  Part III

 

For a long while it was a social faux pas to call out anyone on their weight whether it was to mock, judge or give unsolicited advice in anyway publicly. The only times I have ever been fat shamed have been in a places where cowards felt they could get away with it with little to no repercussions.  Since the advent of social media everyone’s thoughts and feeling on the matter have been supported by “opinion-pieces”, “quack pseudo-scientists”, and any Tom Dick or Janey who thinks they are a doctor, nutritionist and expert in all things because they “know someone” but they have no fucking clue what it is really all about. People who have no compassion ranting and raving on the internet about how it is so easy; just stop eating so much, exercise, calories in and calories out bru-ha-ha. The solution is so much more complex than that. Obesity in itself has layers of complexity which require much explanation; more than I feel like getting into. There are so many factors to consider. I am not going to quantify at this time because quite frankly it I don’t owe anyone any explanations. I do not apologize for my place in the world.  I am me and you are you. I love you as you are, can you love others unconditionally?

Hugs & Shit

The Momma

 "Call them $%!*@ and hide behind the keys of a message board."

-Macklemore 

I chose this picture because Macklmore and Mary Lambert promote love and acceptance is such incredible ways. I salute you!

"The eat right, exercise, health mantras need to be used appropriately and not for fat-shaming purposes."  

"If you are worried for someone's health due to obesity, love them, it is the most healing thing in the world."

 

Peetastrophie, Peenami, Pee-a-thon

My first 15 minutes with Thing 2 this morning...

I wake to hear Thing 2 yelling, "Momma! Momma! Momma! You come here rights now! 1..2..3...! Momma!" The hubs rolls over and says in a sleepy daze, "He wants you." then rolls back to his side. I am not ready to face today but I got up to go to his bedroom. I greet him the same way I always greet my boys with oooohs and ahhhs and morning sweeties etc. Thing 2 pops out of bed and I get a stern lecture. He then brushes past me and stands in the hallway ready to go downstairs. I look to the clock, Thing 1 is already awake watching super why downstairs. I think to myself ok you have 20 minutes to just lie down and relax before I have to get ready for work. As I made my way to the bed I hear a waterfall of sound. I know what it is... Thing 2. I turned around to him fully clothed, legs wide apart and emptying a full night's bladder on the floor. He pointed at it and said, "Look momma a big mess. Clean up time!" He then regaled me with the Barney clean up, clean up song. I went to him perplexed on why he peed through as his diaper when it was empty when I first checked it. And there it was, his penis was sticking out of the top like a little cherub baby water fountain. I grabbed a towel and got him to step on it as I peeled off his pjs. He jumped and laughed thinking it was all fun and games but when he took one step off the town he did a classic bail. His legs went up and he landed on his back right where the rest of the pee was where the towel could not get to. Awesome. He is now covered in pee rolling around in pain. Of course when Thing 2 is in pain he wants a hug. Ah well, pee for everybody. We had a quick shower and put a new diaper on him. We then had a little chat that went a little something like this: "Thing 2 you can play with your penis but you have to put it away when you are done, ok?" To which he responded, "No put away!" So I rephrased my request, "Thing 2 when you are done with your penis you have to.... Clean up, Clean up everybody everywhere, clean up, clean up everybody do your share." He then said, "OK Momma." And with that he literally skipped down the hall, bailed, got up, and then proceeded to go down stairs to watch super why with Thing 1.

Thing 2 bail count so far: 3
Thing 1 banana count so far: 2
Hubs passing the buck: 1
One tired but highly amused momma: 1

Hugs & Shit

The Momma

Drunk Blogging... trying it once.

Drunk Blogging... I thought I would give it a go. I rarely drink. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I speak in past tense the problem is the past has not happened yet. Tense confusion, philosophy lesson, and an all around good time. Don't judge me, or do, I don't care, well maybe a little. Nope, not caring.

Today was a super special day for no reason. I liked today. Holy fuck italics! I don't know I pressed some sort of magic button. You're a magic button. 

Oh mystery solved. SO today was nothing special. I ate some cheese. I crafted a paperairplane out of oldrecycled recyclables. Kind of like potent potables but more recyclables. You know what I really love? Nothing to do with finger paints. Fingerpaints are the bane of my existence. Try them and you will agree that I am right and finger paints are wrong. 

Oh thats right I am writing about my Things! Thing 1 and Thing 2. 

So we woke up. It was nice. It was about as nice as Bob Ross painting a happy little forest. When all of a sudden I heard from Thing 2's room. "Mommmmmaaaaa!" I got up in a stupor and stumbled to his room where I saw the aftersmath of him getting buck and peeing everywhere. I looked at him and said, "Are you 3?" and he replied with a, "Nope! I am 5!" Fair enough, 3 is hard. He then gave me an anatomy lesson on his junk area. I was super impressed. I flicked on the light and promptly walked away in a semi huff. I then visited Thing 1's room where I found the cat had vomited on the floor. I staggered back to my bed and said to the HUBs, "Your turn." I am pretty certain I rolled over and went back to sleep. This is where I won the mother of the year award. 

I can't deal much longer. I am a big tire. 

HUGS and SHRUGS

The Momma

                                                                Drunkn Skunkn

                                      

Hey Fear You're Not Welcome Here

Hello Friends... Before I get into the seriousness of things I want to write a completely bloggable moment I had today:

I was leaving strong start today with Thing 2, Blennifer, and Bladi when...

• Bladi went missing but was found 6 feet from where we were standing within plain view.
• Thing 2 was losing his mind because he needed apple juice
• A stroller toppled over with no baby in it
• 4 toddlers were plotting their escape plan while the door was open
• someone tripped on something
• Food fell on the ground
• A Baby cried out
• Thing 2 farted
• And I was trying to have a conversation with an adult
• This all happened in the span of 10 seconds. 

Moral of the story: Shit goes down at Strong Start
Second Moral of the story: Life in all its glory is fucking hilarious.

Now for something completely different...
I normally go to the gym on Mondays and Wednesdays but my schedule is all mucked up this week. So I decided to go for a nice walk and workout at the outdoor gym at the park across the street from me. Sound plan right? I did some speed walks up and down hills, I did some speed walking on the paths, I went to the outdoor gym to lift and stretch etc... The night was beautiful, the night was warm yet had a cool breeze, it was twilight my favorite time of day, nothing could get more beautiful or glorious.

But it all was not. In my mind I could not deal with exercising outside. It was fucking with my brain. I was judging myself hard. There were so many softball games and soccer games happening all around. I kept thinking about how inadequate I was and how if someone looked at me they must thought holy shit, she needs to workout. I had gotten myself into such a tizzy. After all the self ass-kicking I took myself to the middle of the grass field and lay down. I looked up and the dimming sky and had a cry. I knew my brain was creating a false reality. I knew it was my eating disorder taking a piss. The eating disorder was doing everything in its power to bring me down so I can then literally and figuratively feed myself. I have been down this road before, it is a familiar place.I had not been there in a while but there it was. I picked myself up off the grass and texted my pal Blennifer. I invited myself over to her place and I am so glad I did.

Blennifer reminded me of all the things I already knew but could not see. That other people's opinions of me is none of my business and that my thoughts are hijacking my reality. Brilliant. Thank you Blennifer. It is amazing to see how my intellectual mind gets assimilated by the eating disorder with non-helpful self-destructive self talk. Generally I consider myself a pretty confident person but once in a while my committee of assholes get the best of me and I need to shut that down. I used to have daily episodes of this self destruction and I am so glad to say I rarely feel this way now. But when it rears its ugly head I know it is time for me to take notice and keep on my road to recovery. One day at a time.
Thank you Blennifer. <3

Hugs & Shit

The Momma

                              The one day I wear mascara is the day I decided to cry. Yay waterproof!

Guess Who's Trending?

Many things on the rise...

Autism, Allergies, Depression, and Obesity.

Shit, my family is #trending.

There's my silver lining.

I need that lining to deal with all the shitty infographics out there. 

HUGS and Stuff

The Momma 

                                                              So tired. Yet SO grateful.

Shit Went Down at the Shoppers Drug Mart

I was at Shoppers Drug Mart tonight filling my prescription and as I usually do. I like to wander the isles with no kids and enjoy reading shampoo bottles and travel magazines. It's kinda my gig on a post-gym Monday night. My prescription was filled in a flash and so I took my tins of tuna, shampoo, paper towels, tissues, and Nat Geo magazine to the front to pay for the rest. I get to the cashier and put my items on the counter. I asked her how her night was going, making pleasant small talk. She wasn't having any of it. No problem, I used to work retail, I get it. I then held up my already bagged pre-paid prescription and announced, "Just my prescription." and placed it in the bag for her. That is when shit got real and weird. She took out the prescription bag in a huff and put it with the rest of my stuff and said with attitude, "No, no this is my bag, my groceries, I will bag them how I want." I thought she was joking so I gave her my best puppy dog eyes and pouty lip. Shit, I think I was just told. She gave me the lower lip back, I smiled and she did not. I was silent and could not wait to get the fuck out of there. It was all weird and funny at the same time. She then said, "I hope you were not offended by what I just said." I sheepishly said, "Well yeah, I was just scolded like a 5 year old kid." She quickly responded with an astounding, "Oh sweetie, don't be offended, that is how I talk to everybody." I put on my puppy dog eyes and innocently fired back, "Oh dear, that is not good." She just shrugged. I then tried to pay for my shit as fast as I could. She then got mad because I put my debit card in too quickly and then she got even more annoyed when I had the body language of I want to get the hell out of here and the receipt was 100 meters long and still printing. I got to the car and I had a good laugh. It was a weird, funny, and a slightly abusive transaction with another human being. It also got me thinking, she must really hate her job, her life, or possibly had a really bad night. She probably has an amazing story, or not. Bless her. I hope her night gets a little better. I know mine did.

HUGS & Shit

The Momma