I wake to hear Thing 2 yelling, "Momma! Momma! Momma! You come here rights now! 1..2..3...! Momma!" The hubs rolls over and says in a sleepy daze, "He wants you." then rolls back to his side. I am not ready to face today but I got up to go to his bedroom. I greet him the same way I always greet my boys with oooohs and ahhhs and morning sweeties etc. Thing 2 pops out of bed and I get a stern lecture. He then brushes past me and stands in the hallway ready to go downstairs. I look to the clock, Thing 1 is already awake watching super why downstairs. I think to myself ok you have 20 minutes to just lie down and relax before I have to get ready for work. As I made my way to the bed I hear a waterfall of sound. I know what it is... Thing 2. I turned around to him fully clothed, legs wide apart and emptying a full night's bladder on the floor. He pointed at it and said, "Look momma a big mess. Clean up time!" He then regaled me with the Barney clean up, clean up song. I went to him perplexed on why he peed through as his diaper when it was empty when I first checked it. And there it was, his penis was sticking out of the top like a little cherub baby water fountain. I grabbed a towel and got him to step on it as I peeled off his pjs. He jumped and laughed thinking it was all fun and games but when he took one step off the town he did a classic bail. His legs went up and he landed on his back right where the rest of the pee was where the towel could not get to. Awesome. He is now covered in pee rolling around in pain. Of course when Thing 2 is in pain he wants a hug. Ah well, pee for everybody. We had a quick shower and put a new diaper on him. We then had a little chat that went a little something like this: "Thing 2 you can play with your penis but you have to put it away when you are done, ok?" To which he responded, "No put away!" So I rephrased my request, "Thing 2 when you are done with your penis you have to.... Clean up, Clean up everybody everywhere, clean up, clean up everybody do your share." He then said, "OK Momma." And with that he literally skipped down the hall, bailed, got up, and then proceeded to go down stairs to watch super why with Thing 1.
Thing 2 bail count so far: 3
Thing 1 banana count so far: 2
Hubs passing the buck: 1
One tired but highly amused momma: 1
Hugs & Shit
The Momma
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